Call Me Crazy, But...

Call me crazy, but the colours are dancing like a party! It is awesome! They are so much brighter and just seem to be dancing as if there is music in my head. Upbeat, get up and dance, party music. It is awesome!

It's like the yo-yo has gone up and is staying on a high. Woo! Party! Loving life! So many plans and thoughts just buzzing through my mind. I could plan out my future in the next five minutes where it would usually take a week or two normally on one of these awesome high moods.

I will go to college, take the IB or four/five A-levels. The IB options I would take would be Spanish, English and performance, Biology, Chemistry, Maths and Psychology. The A-levels I would take would be Biology, Chemistry, Religious Studies, Psychology and possibly English Literature or Maths. Then I'll go to university to study medicine.  I'll do my rotations and either specialise in Cardio-vascular surgery, Neurology, Psychiatry or Emergency medicine. I'd love to get a job as a cardiac surgeon. I'd like a guy who loves me. Who gets me for me. That would be nice. But it is not essential. I would love a successful career. To just be so involved in medicine, my passion, and save so many people and just to help them. Improve their quality of life.

If I ever have a family, we'd have a dark blue VW camper van. Just for holidays. We'd walk and cycle everywhere else. Have a healthy lifestyle. Meals would always have a set time and bet set out on the table so everyone can help themselves. We would have a family meal at least once a week. The children would all play an instrument and do a sport. It wouldn't be controlling, but they would be able to choose as long as they did that. We'd have two cats and they'd each get a guinea pig when they are five, to teach them responsibility. The house would have two music rooms. One with a grand piano in the centre on a raised platform. It would have pale walls and one glass wall that overlooks either the garden or the woods or fields or the sea or something beautiful. The other would have other instruments in. We'd go to Church on a Sunday, but the children would be allowed to make their own minds up about their faith. They'd be taught to cook. There will be a room dedicated entirely to books. I'd get married either in a picturesque Church or in the middle of a field with woods on one side under a arch made of recycled wood. The chairs would be mix-matched in style but all the same colour. It will be a sunny day and there would be a barn for shelter. The blue VW would be in the barn with a white bow on it. There would be no alcohol.

But at the moment, I am going to work so hard to achieve A*'s and A's in all my GCSE's. I'm going to volunteer with St. Johns Ambulance service and do my silver DofE then my gold. I am going to take up running again and do yoga, got to replace my Karate with something. I'm going to get back into reading. I'm going to study and not destroy my future. I'd love to learn a new skill. Something useful. I'm going to get work experience placements in hospitals, and a job. Everything is going to be planned out and perfect. Nothing is going to stop me. When I set a goal or target,  I am going to stick to it and achieve it. Nothing is going to stop me from being the best I can possibly be and achieving what I can achieve. Nothing! I will make the most out of the person I could possibly be!

I want to party, go to Glasgow or go on a shopping spree. Just something to celebrate this awesome revolution. I just want to let go and start again. Erase all the bad and fill it with good and happiness. Seriously, green is the best thing ever. It makes me think I can do anything, that;s because I can. So bring on the Latin and Physics. But I am so ready for this new beginning. Out with the bad. Bad foods, bad thoughts and bad emotions and in with the best things. Life is changing and for the better!

Fallen In Love So Much There Is No Coming Back

Seriously, I have fallen so deeply in love with life that there is no coming back. I love living so much. Yeah, it may have it's horrifying downs and stuff, but it is just too good to waste. In another life, I may have been a hippy and died from drug abuse or something, but I am not making the same mistake again. I am going to live life to its full. No point in chasing unachievable dreams, or chasing guys or trying to be something you're not to fit it. Life is so perfect the way it is and the way it is supposed to be!

If you look at the world around you, it is just so beautiful. There is no way on Earth that all the scientific events could have lined up and been so perfect and created the right conditions just be accident. There has to be a God of some kind. Science is real, but for everything to be so precise and perfect, there has to be something more. Just look at the leaves on the trees for instance. The smallest and most simple looking thing. But yet they are so complex and designed so perfectly that there has to be some sort of designer. It is mad for there not to be.

Life is so colourful. The colours that we see round us as beautiful. If I went blind, I would so miss the colours of the natural world. Who wouldn't? Who wouldn't miss the green of the leaves, or the blue of the sky or the beautiful selection of colours which you see just walking down a busy street. Man, I'd even miss the colours of the pavement, all stained with chewing gum and stuff. If I went blind, would I still see the colours of peoples voices? Hmm. Maybe. But I'm not willing to try that out. I like being able to see.

What else is so brilliant about life? Well, the majority of people in life. The wonderful, unique, awesome people that make every day worth while. Your friends, family, people you see but don't really know, even the person you hate the most. If it was just you, alone, in the world, you would get so lonely. People are fantastic little critters. Although I don't like most people, the world would be pointless without people. I'd get bored, and who would there be to talk to? Talking is one of the best things ever! I love it so much, I don't stop.

So yeah. I have fallen in love with life. Still yet to fall in love with another human, but life is pretty awesome. Just breathing is awesome. Is it me, or does the air in the early morning taste and feel different to the air in the middle of the day and the early evening and in the dead of night? It feels and tastes so different. I love the night air. It feels so fresh and awesome. Just breathing is awesome.

Life is fantastic people. If you don't like it... don't speak until you do. It took a while for me to appreciate life and I couldn't have done it  with out my friends. I'm not going to say how amazing they are because I say it an awful lot and it goes with out saying.