Side Order Of Awkwardness

Today I am going to tell you how to make the perfect side dish to any situation- awkwardness. 

Ingredients: 

• 1 dysfunctional family. Must include a drunk, stressed woman and two teenagers with contrasting personalities. 
• 1 carb and fat full meal
• Plenty of water
• Plenty of alcohol
• A bottle of denial
• 2 table spoons of ignorance
• A gallon of pressure

Method:

1. Create a day full of refined sugar, fat and carbohydrates as the only thing on offer.
2. Give the father a good lashing of alcohol and keep on doing so every ten minutes. 
3. Then mix in most of the denial, be sure to save some for later.
4. Next add in 1 table spoon of ignorance and mix well. Leave to stew on the stove for about three hours.
5. When close to the boil add in the water and leave for another half an hour.
6. Next add in the rest of the family and the meal.
7. Pile on the pressure, add more alcohol and turn the heat right up. 
8. Add in the rest of the denial and ignorance. 
9. Give it a quick mix and watch the awkwardness unfold.

Safety:

• Have communication methods on stand by.
• Keep all guns out of sight
• Be prepared for lots of hate being thrown your way (safety goggles advisable)